Self-pleasure. What a loaded phrase. For many people, this phrase can bring about an array of different emotions. Empowerment, shame, excitement, fear.
Growing up I never talked about self-pleasure, because it was such a taboo and stigmatized subject especially for women and non-binary people. Until I was able to talk to other people I trusted, I truly believed that masturbation was shameful, and I carried so much guilt for pleasuring myself.
Self-pleasure is an act of rebellion, it is like a giant middle finger to the patriarchal society we live in. As someone that was born into a woman’s body, I never felt like the body I occupied was mine, because of our society’s objectifying culture. When I finally took a hold of the empowerment of self-pleasure, I felt closer to my body than ever. It allowed me to reclaim my body as my own, and celebrate it for all the support it gives me.
Get familiar with your body.
If you haven’t looked down there, do it. Sit in front of a mirror and just take a good stare at your genitals. Often, we are so disconnected from that part of our body, and this is a good way to visually reconnect with that part of you.
The goal of self-pleasure doesn’t have to be to orgasm but rather an exploration to discover what makes you feel good. If you are sensual try a hot bath or candlelit room, or reading erotica. It’s all about prioritizing your desires!
Create a safe place for yourself.
Self-pleasure can be beautiful if you approach it as a form of self-care and liberation. If you are in a space that makes you feel comfortable then you are more likely to enjoy the process. A safe place can be both physical and emotional, so just be mindful of what this brings up for you. If you are inclined to journal about your feelings, do it!
Experiment with toys and lubrication.
If masturbation hasn’t felt good to you in the past, it is helpful to try using a vibrator, lubrication, or other sex toys. I personally like to mix it up and keep things fresh, so alternate between using your fingers and other techniques.
On your period? No problem, we’ve got you covered.
What is Menstrubating?
It is the term used when referring to masturbating when menstruating
Womanizer and Lunette launched the Menstrubation Study in May 2020. The global clinical study determined that menstrubation can help ease period pain. Ninety percent of people in the study recommend masturbation to combat period pains to a friend. Seventy percent said regular masturbation helped them reduce the intensity of their period cramps overall.
The science behind it:
- Orgasms increase blood flow to your uterus, which can increase your tolerance for cramping
Benefits of masturbating
- masturbation can help prevent cervical infections and UTIs through the process of ‘tenting,’ which is the opening of the cervix that occurs as part of the arousal process
- Research by Gloria Brame, Ph.D. said, “An orgasm is the biggest non-drug blast of dopamine available.”
- Orgasms can help you sleep better! After an orgasm, your body releases vasopressin and melatonin to aid you in falling and staying asleep.
Worried about blood?
- Try using a condom if you plan to use a dildo for easier cleanup
- You can keep your tampon or cup in if you are exploring the clit
- Don't be afraid to lay down a towel
- Do it in the shower
So be a rebel! Give yourself a little lovin’!